so much to tell…

There has been so many things going on in my life I don’t know where to even start. I wont go back to my last post and see where I left off I will just jump into the things I am going to talk about today.

I know Ive said this before but I am going to make an effort to post on here more and keep everyone in the loop. hopefully that will help even further with my moods and such as it did in the beginning of this blog. {which is surprisingly over a year -even though most of that time I wasn’t active.}

For those just joining, I’m Ophelia Jones (32), mommy, pagan, bitchy…. and this is my blog. I write about my life and family. I have a husband Oliver (41), who I have been with since I was 17. A 12 year old boy, Ophion, who has Asperger’s, a 10 year old boy, Ollie, who is a video game junkie and a 9 year old fatty pooch named Opal. I suffer from the miserable mental health monsters of, bipolar 2, PTSD from sexual abuse at the hands of my father and others, generalized anxiety disorder, ADHD and more. I suffer from health issues of varying degree from PCOS to diabetes 2, NAFLD and more. This blog is used as a connection to the outside world that I don’t necessarily get any other way.  so without further adieu…. Lets jump right in

ME:

A few months ago I began getting my abilify as a once monthly injection so I would be guaranteed to actually get the meds as needed instead of missing or skipping doses. it has made a lot of head way in adjusting my moods and such. we need a slight adjustment as its not quite strong enough, (as I hit a major downswing and was seriously contemplating hospitalization…if it is like that again I will absolutely be checking myself in). but we will get it there. Ive also had to restart all my other meds for  diabetes….currently my a1c sits at 10.6, blood pressure, and cholesterol….4 more meds in total, plus vitamin D, for a grand total of 5 meds and 1 vitamin.  which is still less than I use to be on. yesterday was the 2 year anniversary for my fathers death….many people made posts about how they cant believe its been so long and blah blah blah…..I personally don’t feel its been long enough so I tried to avoid social media as much as I could. one post got me in particular I must have missed it when it was originally posted 2 years ago….it was a post about how he was her “one” you know soulmate type shit….now this was posted after knowing the disgusting vile person he was and what he did to me and others. how can you suddenly come to the realization after he died knowing what he did? I just will never understand.

OLIVER:

Oliver has had some issues with his drinking, but he is working on it for me which I am happy about. I mean he would prefer to be able to drink as he wants but hes been trying and that’s all i’ll say about that…..then he comes home after drinking on the golf course while typing the bit about Ollie….WTF?!?!

OPHION:

we have been home schooling for about a month so far this year for my oldest son Ophion. it has gone surprisingly well with minimum fighting. His moods and behavior have been a lot better as well. He still loses his temper too quickly with his father and we need to work on that but over all it is a major improvement over how he was with the public school system.

OLLIE:

Ollie, Ollie, Ollie….where to begin with this amazing little boy. well today was parent teacher conferences and we learned just how far behind he has become with writing and spelling and such…in years passed we never really were able to see his writing as they never really had homework so I never saw more then a sentence or two. Now in 5th grade they write more and I see how far behind he is in his writing and it actually made me cry to know I let this fall to the back burner and he got so far behind. he’s also being to large of a social butterfly. he’s also recently opened up about being suicidal, which was a shocking blow to us. it seems to be linked to anger at this time so that is something we are getting him help with. I cant say it surprised me per say as this is the age it all started with me, but I was really hoping not to pass that part of me on to either of my kids.

well for now I think I am going to end this and try to come back tomorrow….

until next time

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